Brides can get somewhat stressed during the wedding planning process. When it all gets too much its a bridesmaid's job to offer a shoulder to cry on, a cup of tea and a few kind words. However it's all too easy to inadvertently say the wrong thing and make everything a whole lot worse. We have put together our top 5 tips with the worst things you can say to a bride. However we bet there are a whole load more.
'It Was About Time He Proposed'
One of your best friends has become engaged and is getting married (HOW exciting!). Surely you can think of a better way to offer your congratulations than pointing out that groom was a bit slow off the mark to get down on one knee. Show the bride how excited and happy you are, both for her wedding and to be a bridesmaid. This should do nicely:
'Congratulations, I am so happy for you both. I can't wait for the wedding day! You will make such a beautiful bride. Can we start planning now?'
'How Much Weight Do You Want To Lose?'
Sure, the bride may want to lose a couple of pounds before the wedding. But never assume this. Lots of people are perfectly happy in their own skin and don't want or need to lose any weight. Asking them how much weight they plan to lose might spiral them into weight loss insecurities. Not cool.
Just steer clear of weight questions. Let the bride bring it up in her own way. If she feels like she needs to lose weight, provide helpful and kind comments such as:
'Well you know you will look beautiful whether you lose weight or not. If you want we could start running together'
'I Am Not Wearing That Dress'
Refusing to wear a bridesmaid dress is just so unhelpful. Bridesmaids have one job, to help the bride through her wedding day. Lots of bridesmaid dresses are lovely, some are totally hideous. Whether you like the dress or not, it is the bride's choice.
She may give you free reign to choose the dress you want but never presume this is the case. She may have a very clear vision for the way she wants her bridesmaids to look and you should try to respect that.
If you really feel insecure or uncomfortable in the dress, talk to your bride to come up with a solution. Perhaps slightly altered sleeves or a longer version. But if it's just the style or colour that you're not keen on, try to plaster a grin on your face, get it on and rock the look.
'What's Your Wedding Budget?'
Hey Nosey Parker! :) Its the question we are all dying to know! Resist the urge because the bride will probably feel pretty uncomfortable divulging her finances to you. If she doesn't mind you knowing, then she will tell you all about it as part of the wedding planning process.
'What's The Plan For The Wedding Day Again?'
When the bride sends an email or calls you to tell you the plans fo her wedding day, please pay attention. Grab a pen and write down where you are meant to be, what you should be doing and at what time. Nothing is more annoying for a bride than explaining the wedding day plans over and over again. It also appears like the bridesmaids don't care, which probably isn't true (we all have busy lives!) but it can come across badly all the same. So pay attention and take note.
We hope these five tips have you helped you steer your way through the world of bridesmaid etiquette. If you have anymore tips you would like to add, leave a comment below.